Running Diary of an Off Road Triathlon

So by now you have gotten the idea that I am not just going to sit down and write a boring old race report. I twist them a little, make them interesting, and try and make you laugh at least a once. With this in mind I give you a running diary of my latest race In The Dirt off Road Tri

Coach Tony and I ready to Rock!

03:52 am. I wake up, bright eyed and bushy tailed. I am a type B personality during my 'regular' life, one of the most easy going, laid back dudes you could chance to meet. But my racing persona, we’ll call him Speed Racer, is type A all the way. I think it’s my bizarro way of blowing off steam. Anyways I need to be at the race, any race really even a potato sack race, as soon as they will let me in the gate and sometimes even before (I sneak around staking out my transition spot). Today registration will open at 5am and it will take me 45 min to get there. So I am up and ready to go early, I really don’t sleep much anyways. I grab some boxes of Gatorade to hand out and off I go!

04:55am Staking out my transition spot is difficult when you leave your Icon headlamp at home. On the bright side I always forget something so I am hoping that the headlamp was the thing for today! Easy to overcome my forgetfulness with my trusty Droid phone’s camera light (you think I was getting paid for all these product endorsements I am dropping)

07:10 Time to head down to the beach. Something unusual about this race, the run from the beach to the transition area is longer than the swim will be! Need to chill on the way up from the beach and not blow up before I even get to the bike. Also I am bring my flip flops down so I can run up with them on and not slice up my feet. Guess I am not the only one with that idea!

Hey is that my leg??

07:17 The lake is a little warmer than when I got in. There are two kinds of triathletes, those that warm the lake and those that lie about it!

About to warm up the Lake

07:49 The race is starting late because a fog bank rolls in, suddenly a chill up runs up my spine thinking about that movie, The Fog! It was an early 80’s horror movie with Adrienne Barbeau and Jamie Lee Curtis in it, a dynamic duo for the teenage boy audience for sure, oh wait may wave is lining up!

08:02 I am out of the water, third fastest for my race! I never take swim distance that literally anymore; they never seem to be exact to the distance posted! They should just be listed as Not too hard (sprint), Longish (oly), A Decent Workout (1/2 IM) and See You in awhile (IM). I just go by my time relative to the other swimmers in my heat or age group these days. This was a good swim for me and I grab my flip flops and run to the bike.

Finished already?

08:04 It seems like 20 minutes later but I finally arrive at my bike, all is well except for the ton of tiny ants that are on my gel flask. They say a little protein helps you digest all those carbs faster, we’ll see…

08:36 First lap of Mountain bike done! Started out third, fell to fifth but recovered to third again. The beginning of the ride is soft from many a hoofed beast traveling over them. HR spiked to 170 and had to take a step back to catch my breath. Long climb in the middle of the course where I was able to stay on top of the bike for most of, jumping off to push the iron horse up and over a few tough boulders. A look back shows my lap time is among the leaders.

08:44 Make contact with rider in second place here is my chance…

08:45 Oh my, back tire is either tapering off steroids and becoming flabby or has just lost a bunch of air. Still about ¾ of a lap to go so I hop off, remove the wheel, rip out tube, new tube in, re-inflate, off I go. Still in third!! Stay calm.

08:53 About ½ way through lap and the tire is losing its will to live again, must have missed a thorn or something when I cleaned it out before putting the new tube in. I try adding air at an aid station; it works, for 1 minute! I must finish the second half of this lap on a flat tire. 

09:06 I have just finished pushing the bike up the big climb of the lap and I hear a spotter say “you have to be kidding me!”  Big downhill coming, never rode down a rutted, steep, suicide downhill on a flat rear tire, hey there’s a first time for everything!

09:15 I am happy to be alive!! I made it down the hill. One more uphill, then a gentle downhill grade to the finish. I can do this!!! The race course now joins up with the road, and the two road tri’s going on at the same time, and the road is crowded with other racers. Running up the hill, pushing my bike, I pass several road riders, they jokingly curse at me, I snicker silently.

09:20 Somewhere around a mile to the transition area, gentle downhill along the road, I can do this!! I hop bike on bike, put all my weight over the front tire, I am going to make it. The tire, obviously having had enough of this crap, disembowels itself, wrapping its flaccid tube around my cassette. The rear tire will now no longer move. About ¾ mile to the transition area, I can’t do this…. F it all! I throw the bike over my shoulder and start to run.

What! I can ride it?? Oh I just thought I was suppose to carry it

09:30 I arrive at T-2 with the bike on my back, everything hurts, I am sweating and cursing. Parents are diverting their children’s vision and covering their ears. 

09:31 I am too tired to keep going but, in a case of classic miscommunication, the message does not get out to all parties involved. Instinctually I grab my stuff and get out of transition in under a minute.

09:48 I am feeling it, the adrenaline from getting back is flowing and running without a ridiculously heavy mountain bike on my back seems easy, I am flying (for me), sub 7 minute miles the whole way. During my run/bike phase I had dropped from 3 to, by my best guess, 8^th. Now on the run I pass someone which moves me to 7^th overall, it’s the second time that day I hear someone say “you’ve got to be kidding me!”

09:51 It’s over, I have the second fastest run of the race and I made it home. I can’t tell you what kept me keep going, I know I have DNF’d in the past and always regretted it. I really had no pressing appointments anyways, so why stop?? 

 Final Results had me 1^st in my Age Group and 7^th Overall. It wasn’t a big race by any means but it was Epic for me!!